Six Kids, No Home, and a Life Built on Miracles: Turning the Refiner’s Fire Into Success | Debbie Hart

SPEAKER_00 0:58

Welcome everyone to Doing Business with a Servant's Heart Podcast. I'm your host, Steve Ramona. I am so thrilled to have you join us today. This podcast is dedicated to exploring the idea of doing business and living life with a purpose, serving others and yes, achieving success. We believe that when we approach our work and our lives with a servant's heart, we can truly make a difference. We create this show for you because we want everyone to be motivated, inspired, and educated educated and epiducated too. You can do either one to make an impact in your world. Hey, whether you're an entrepreneur, a community leader, or simply someone looking to bring more purpose into your day life, this podcast is here to support you. My guest is so incredible. I spent five, 10 minutes with her. I'm already in love, business love. She's just a typical service heart. While you're listening to her, I want you to think about how you're going to serve today. And with that service, what impact will you create today? And the key word is today. Let's not wait till tomorrow to change somebody's life. Today's episode is brought to you by our amazing sponsor, Pantheon Alliance. Picture yourself joining an elite community of high-income, successful business owners and entrepreneurs in a variety of different industries, all working together to get educated and build a referral marketplace to do different types of things. Imagine the heights you'll reach with this incredible community. Reach out to me with any questions and I will get you the information. With that being said, I love powerful women because I think they have a huge impact. And this woman has such a servant's heart, but she's got power to support people. Debbie, welcome to the show.

SPEAKER_02 2:34

Thank you so much, Steve. It is an honor to be here.

SPEAKER_00 2:38

I'm gonna start a different way here. This is a doing business with a servant's heart. You're super successful. And how do you keep your servant's heart going as you are successful?

SPEAKER_02 2:49

Well, it I lived on miracles for three years. I mean, basically my whole life, but literally lived on miracles for three years. So I never go a day without starting my day. You know, like the Bible says, put the kingdom of God first and all else will be added unto you. Uh, my life is a living testament of that. That's how I got through challenges that I went through in my life is through miracles by staying tuned in. And so for me, it's never ever just a business. Everything is spiritual, everything matters, every hu every business needs to be humanized because in the end, that's all that matters. And so that I do I do tend to lead that way. I based on history, but based on, I mean, principles, uh, that it's a combination of both. You need to serve seek first to serve, not seek first the money, because when you serve enough people, the money comes. And you do deserve to support yourself and your family. It's not like we're asking people to just give everything away for free. Um, but we ought to have some sources and tools and support for people who can't access it any other way. I do. I do have a lot of free resources and tools so that people can get started at any stage and any age and any level.

SPEAKER_00 4:28

I love that because I did go through your website and you had free training. I'm like, love this girl already because successful or not, we should give information away. We should serve and support people. Since you mentioned your miracles, let's talk about your story because it's amazing and talk about these miracles that happen.

SPEAKER_02 4:47

Yeah, it's interesting because I have told my story a few times now, and mostly it's in a business setting. And so people don't really bring up the faith aspect of that. So this will be a first to actually share those parts. But 11, 12 years ago, I was a stay-at-home homeschooling mother of six, and suddenly received in the same moment a divorce notice with an immediate eviction notice. So my spouse at the time had paid his attorney to draft up an eviction notice that said, if you're not, you don't own this home and if you're not off the premises immediately, you'll be arrested for trespassing. I didn't know that that was not legal because it was presented to me by an attorney. And I quickly found out that the bank accounts had been emptied out, and so I had no resources uh to hire an attorney to figure that out. So I looked at my six children and I said, pack your most favorite things. You've got about five, ten minutes, and we're never coming home. That's something no mom wants to ever tell their children. But and and I share this part, how there was a woman who had, I haven't shared this part. We I go ahead and I say we bounced around in people's basements for three years. Uh, we uh ate food from a combination of welfare and our local church has a what's called a bishop's storehouse. But behind the scenes of structure of how to help someone who can't seem to help themselves, because at that time, since I had gotten married and started having babies right after high school, I was going to get a degree, but I kept having children and children and children. And my my first priority was to raise them and be there for them. And so someday I was going to get my degree, but someday never came because my youngest had just turned three and my oldest was 15. So at that point in time, without a degree or career development, I could not even get a regular job that would cover daycare expenses for that many children, let alone our living expenses. And so we did have to live with other people, and I could not go live with family because they were in a different state, and he was suing for custody so that he would not have to pay child support or alimony. And so uh here's where the miracle comes in. I haven't shared this part of the story anywhere else. The woman that took us in first, I had only known for two months. She had five children of her own, lived in a little duplex. One of them was autistic. And so it's not like she just had this big, elaborate house with extra guest rooms. But we had met her two months prior because our daughters were on the same soccer team. And our daughters bonded pretty quickly. But at one point in time, she had had inglings. Now, I had not told anyone what was going on at home. I didn't even really know what he was planning, but things had been off and I could feel it. And I hadn't really known how to talk to anybody about that because, you know, as a woman of faith, I believed, you know, you don't, you don't badmouth your spouse. You endure to the end, you make it work no matter how hard it seems. Looking back, a lot of people ask, how did you tolerate all that? And I, you know, you just you just do when you're in it. And so she came to me one day and said, you know, I love you and I love your daughter. There, uh, our daughters are really fast friends. You are welcome at my home anytime, but my daughter is not welcome at yours because we just feel very uncomfortable with your husband. And I've not I had not shared anything with anyone about how I had been, you know, having these feelings and I'm not sure what's going on. And I just thought, wow, she's picking up something too. And she just and she just shared. And so I said, I don't know what's going on, but things do feel different and odd at home, and and I appreciate you sharing that with me. So time went on and and not very much time, but she could just tune in. She was you know, she was a woman who went to church, prayed several times a day, raised her family in the gospel. And and uh when the time when that time came, I called her and she said, I'm already on my way. And I've already prepared a room for you because God told me to.

unknown 9:37

Oh my god.

SPEAKER_02 9:38

And and we'd only known her two months. So things like that continuously happened. Um, it did get to a point where they couldn't have, you know, seven extra house guests for very long. Who can? And then the next thing happened just like that. There was another woman who was uh parent of my daughter's friend again, and she said, We had been feeling like something was happening. Um, it we saw you move in with someone else. We didn't know what was going on, but we've prepared our entire basement for you. And um, when the time came for us to to move, uh someone else had already just been prompted and inspired and and told to provide a space for us for a time. And that happened about four or five times over the course of three years. And we, you know, it was desperate and scary, but there was always a miracle. We always had shelter, we always had food, we always had our needs met through miracles. So I've never been able to share that part of the story. So I appreciate you asking because it's an important part.

SPEAKER_00 10:53

I appreciate you being open about it. It's amazing. Six kids, and you know, my thought, and you asked me about this too. How'd your kids get through it?

SPEAKER_02 11:04

You know, it's interesting because look telling the story over a decade later, you can see the results of the refiner's fire. There's a price to pay for everything, and most character traits are purchased through the refiners fire. That is why my logo is a fire, and that's why we tell those stories. Uh, because the deep empathy and compassion and resiliency and drive and ambition, those are forged in the fires of abandonment and betrayal. And there's usually no other way to really build those traits to an extreme level. So while going through it, if you would have asked me how my kids are getting through it, I wouldn't have said, very well. We are, we are, you know, they're falling to pieces, anger issues, school issues, you know, they had to leave their home, they lost their dad, they had to leave their school, they had to leave their friend, they had to give up all of their activities. We had no more piano, no more violin, no more karate, no more dance. Eventually, when we we didn't have to move every two months, when we found somewhere we could stay a little bit longer term, I was able to get some of those going again. We cleaned my family, we would do janitorial work at the dance studio so my daughter could take dance again and whatever we could do to be scrappy and start to make things work again. And that's that resiliency and that resourcefulness, right? You start to look for ways to create opportunities mostly out of desperation. But then you, once you've built that mindset that sees solutions and opportunities instead of walls and challenges, that becomes your new skill. And so now I'm in a much better position in life, but I still have a solution-oriented, opportunity-driven mindset. If little things happen that can just shake a lot of other people, I don't, they don't shake me at all. I just see, I see a thousand possibilities to grow from this. So now they're strong and they're resilient. My oldest son didn't get through it very well. Um, he's still struggling, but the rest of my kids have been very self-driven and have put themselves through college. And a couple of them are, you know, have children and I have grandchildren now. I just have two teenage boys left at home. They're still homeschooled, they're in a homeschool co-op. Like my son just went to a mechanics class all year on site, rebuilt a car, welding and everything, and then have the opportunity to drive in a demolition derby. And so, you know, I just like it's like entrepreneurship for parenting, is what homeschool co-ops are. Um, so again, I found a way to continue to homeschool them as well because it was very important to me to stay involved in my children's lives. That's how and why I became an entrepreneur. First of all, I needed a way to make money that wasn't outside the home because I couldn't even earn enough to pay for them, let alone, you know, I didn't have six babies to pay someone else to raise them. So I learned how to make money with whatever skills that I had because I had to, forged in that fire of desperation, but then I built upon that. So then I would choose to seek out another certification or course and then add to my skills and invest in myself, and then charge more and do more and save some of that and invest in myself again and charge more and do more. And then I just I just built everything that way.

SPEAKER_00 14:35

You're an angel. I know you probably heard that, but I know you had all those miracles, but miracles come to an angel to somebody that does what you do. So God bless you. Oh my god, I didn't know this is the whole story. What did you you know? I can get emotional here because it's crazy. So, what have you taken from this whole horrific situation? You're successful now, audience. She's kicking a butt. I love it. You can get through if you can get through this, anybody can get through anything. Like you said, the little things don't bother you. But what have you learned that's taking you now as an entrepreneur that's helped you grow, be successful?

SPEAKER_02 15:09

You know, I kind of I kind of started to touch on that already. It is to embrace the refiner's fire, actually, because that is the price to pay. Those characteristics are forged in those fires. And so the the relentless, relentlessly driven, ambitious woman that I am today was forged in those fires. I would have been, you know, comfortable in my complacency forever to be status quo because I didn't know any better. And so, had I not gone through that, I would not have become who I am today. And I really truly love who I am and how my life is today. And the same thing with the traits and skills and characteristics that my children have forged because of that fire. And so, like we were chatting about just before this podcast started on my podcast, those are the questions that I ask. It's not the success principles, like I mentioned, the miracle morning and the 5 a.m. Club, those are great, but everyone knows about gratitude journals and affirmations and cold plunges. What is the fire that you walked through? And how did you get out of that? How did you use that to make you a better person? Because some people go through those and they stay a victim for the rest of their lives. So I want to share the stories of the refiners fire of the people who chose to make it, make it make themselves better instead of bitter, because that everyone goes through the fire, but there is a determining factor, which I call the ignition point, which is a decision that you make. You have to choose that to refine you instead of define you.

SPEAKER_00 16:58

I love that. And that leads to the overcoming imposter syndrome. I think imposter syndrome is everywhere nowadays with the world as it is. How do people overcome it?

SPEAKER_02 17:10

Well, yeah that's true. We I talk to anyone at any age, no matter if they're 60 or 70 or if they've been doing business 30 years, they still sometimes feel like a teenager trying to figure it out, wondering when they're going to actually feel like the expert, because there's always someone else somewhere, especially with social media these days, that appears to be more successful or have more experience or be able to do it better. So I do think it is something that everyone faces, at least in part. But it does come through that the fire of choosing to look for your. So this is the this is the refiner's fire moment, the ignition point moment is when you you decided. So now you can consciously decide to look for your weak points and put yourself in a position where you will push past that. So if public speaking is your fear, and that is something that would help you either grow as a person or grow your business, then go create a way to get on some stages and or create stages, create some opportunities to speak in public until it is no longer a debilitating fear, you have then grown from it. So that is how I, you know, that is something, and then looking at your why and what it's stopping you from. Because if you let imposter syndrome stop you from showing up to a networking event or making that cold call or launching an online campaign, whatever it is you're letting it stop you from, think about what you're missing out on because of the imposter syndrome. And if you need support, a mentor, a coach, an accountability partner, an actual business partner, there are not there are knowledge, tools, and resources everywhere to be able to push past those things. So it's just a matter of making that a decision that you will, and then either finding like setting a deadline for the way, the time and the way and the day to do it, or finding someone to hold you through that, like walk through that fire with you.

SPEAKER_00 19:25

I love what you're saying because you that's my life. Starting the podcast, I didn't know what I was doing. I was nervous. Now I could do these left to right, and now I got speaking gigs I never had before. I'm 63 years old, I never spoke till last year. And your absolute audience, she's nailed it. That's my life. People now asking me to speak because I got past my imposter syndrome. It was okay. Was I good the first time? Probably not. It didn't matter if I infected one person. And when you speak, I know you talked about that. If you affect one person or everybody, that's the goal, right? With speaking.

SPEAKER_02 19:58

Uh yeah, exactly. And and that's the other thing. The duty devolves upon you to get your calling out there, your mission and your purpose to magnify your calling of your existence. It is actually selfish not to. So imposter syndrome is hurting the people who are waiting to hear from your message or to be served by your product or your service. This is, I've talked about this uh when I speak at my events, my friend James Dixon, who's an amputee, and he's now a public speaker, but for years he wasn't. And he has changed thousands of lives since he finally decided to move past that imposter syndrome. And none of those lives would have been touched had he let himself be afraid. And then when he was done speaking, I asked how many people in the audience were moved by. So I had Jeff Griffin on as well. We talked about that, how many people were moved and touched by him and Dan Clark and some of my other speakers. And I asked them, how many of you have gotten tools today or inspiration today that's going to change your life for the better? And of course, everyone raises their hand. So then you guys would not have been changed had I not followed my dreams as well. Because when I began speaking and running events, my business mentor at the time actually told me I was making a fool of myself because we do. None of us are good the first few times. You know, my first few podcasts and public speaking gigs or what and first few events were definitely bumpy. That's the game. But instead of feeling supported and encouraged, like most mentors and coaches do, mine at the time actually told me the opposite and that I was being a fool. And thank goodness I chose not to listen to him because I have also been able to change countless lives for the better. I received thank you messages on a regular basis from people who either launched their business because of some of my events or podcasts. Trainings or were able to stay in business because they learned some tools that make them now profitable. Because sometimes business owners work 24-7 for almost zero pay, even though their revenue might show a seven-figure business. It's what are you bringing home? You know, revenue feeds your ego, but profits feed your family. And I'm all about feeding your family and bringing the money home because that was my why. That was my origin story. I needed money to feed my kids. It doesn't matter what I say I do. It doesn't matter if I say I sold a thousand products this month. What are my margins? What are my bottom lines? What am I bringing home to feed my family? So um, so yeah, that's how you get past imposter syndrome is you put yourself through the fire intentionally instead of waiting for the fire.

SPEAKER_00 22:47

Fantastic message. I love it. So many new entrepreneurs come in. It's easy to be a business owner slash entrepreneur. What's the fastest and easiest way to succeed if you're just starting out as an entrepreneur?

SPEAKER_02 23:00

Well, getting an MVP out to market and being willing to get some market feedback. So it's just like pushing past that imposter syndrome. Everyone has a case of the one size. Once I am perfect at pitching, once I have the perfect product, well, you won't actually know what that is until you get some market feedback. So you have to put a minimum viable product out there that is not perfect yet, so that you can receive feedback, constructive criticism, get that thick skin on you, and then you get going that way. I know way too many entrepreneurs who are waiting one, two, three years to launch because they want everything to be perfect. And yeah, you're shaking your head because you know you've just got my look, my first event was a teen event. And from the idea in my head to the deadline, I set 21 days. And and you know, my partner, Sean Finnegan. I said, Can I use your space? And he says, What's your idea? And I told him and I told him how fast. And he's like, You're probably gonna get like eight people there. So just don't have high expectations. I said, just watch me, just believe in me. You don't know me yet, just wait. And he's like, Look, I've seen a lot of people do this because he also sees a lot of people just push things off and just wait and have all these ideas and just talk. And he said, No, I'm not a talker, I'm an action taker. I had to raise six kids by myself. You bet I know how to take action. And so 21 days from the idea in my head to the actual first event, and 150 people showed up. Teenagers and their parents on a Saturday morning to learn about entrepreneurship. We ran out of chairs, we ran out of food, which are amazing problems to have. And it was bumpy. But every event has gotten better because I'm just willing to take action and say, like, does the market want this as much as I want this? I wanted this for my kids, which is why I did it. But I did it instead of just asking for my boys to shadow some of these entrepreneurs in my life. I just decided to turn it into event to see if there was a market. Clearly there was, and they were patient with it being my new, my first event. But we built everything that way. So then I took them and at the speakers and I built the podcast off of that. And then the parents in the room had said, can we come too? And so I built an event for adults off of that, uh, because based on what the market wanted, because I just fought past imposter syndrome and did it anyway. And then you take the feedback and build from there.

SPEAKER_00 25:36

You listen to your market, you listen to your customers. That's a great lesson. Oh my gosh. And easy to do if people don't take action.

SPEAKER_02 25:45

It really is. If you're just willing to take action, the analogy I use a lot is you can never become a tennis player by reading a book about it. You have to get on the court and scrape your knees and smash your face, and you will look foolish while you learn the game, but there is no other way. And then you start to fine-tune how you serve and how you hit. And uh, you know, you start to fine-tune it only through action and experience. And quite honestly, the experienced entrepreneurs are cheering you on when they see you do that. People are so afraid of judgment and rejection and haters. And but I guarantee you, 99% of those guys are the ones not in the game, not playing. So you don't need to listen to them anyway. When I launched my podcast, James Dixon was one of our first guests. Dan Young, self-made billionaire, owner of PC Laptops, was one of our first guests. And I'm a bra, you know, and James has two million subscribers on his YouTube channel. And I had 55. Do you think he was making fun of me? No, he was cheering us on. He said, I am so proud of you. I'm so excited to watch you grow. And now we're at over 5,000 subscribers. And literally, yesterday was our one-year anniversary on our podcast. And, you know, those guys who are super successful are the ones cheering you on because they went through the same fire. They put themselves through that fire.

SPEAKER_00 27:15

Great message. Well, we're coming to the end here. I want to have some fun. We've talked some serious, and definitely your story is very serious. And audiences, I know they're thinking you're just a rock star. I think you are. And if I say it, you better believe it. Half kidding. Um I I love asking this question at the end. So you come to a restaurant, there's a table of four, you're occupying the first seat. Who's gonna sit in the other three seats, dead or alive? Why are they sitting there? And most importantly, what food would you order?

SPEAKER_02 27:47

Oh my goodness, that's an intense question. Um, so for to ask any spiritual questions, I would definitely want Christ to sit at the table. For any mindset and success questions, I would want Napoleon Hill to sit at the table. And the other, you said three guests or four?

SPEAKER_00 28:09

Three guests, three guests.

SPEAKER_02 28:10

Three guests. Okay. Um, business scaling and profitability. Um I would probably want to ask maybe like a Rockefeller or a Bill Gates type. Elon Musk, Elon Musk, actually, because I I don't like just making money and just to make money. I like someone who's looking for, I don't always love everything he does and studies and research, but I love the mindset of always looking for ways to make the world a better place with global impact. So I would probably choose Elon Musk for the third.

SPEAKER_00 28:47

I love it. And better is good. That's whether you like him or not, he is bettering. Sometimes he does it in a weird way, but that's okay. That's that's his life, and he can do that. Uh okay. So what are we eating?

SPEAKER_02 28:59

Oh, um, probably a salad because quite honestly, I in my coaching and mentoring programs, I do make people go over like a morning routine and an energy routine. Because in order to do all people are always asking me, how are you? You have six kids, you have grandkids, you run three different businesses. Like, how do you always have all this energy? You're everywhere, you're doing all the things. I'm also the lead singer in a rock band. They're like, How do you do it all? Because I manage my energy. I I prioritize eating well and healthy and getting movement in and to create that energy so that I do have the energy to do all the things that I need to get done. I don't have the ability to nap in the afternoon or to get sick. Like if I'm the I'm the sole provider and I'm okay now, I have some reserves now, but many years I didn't. And so if I was sick, then we would suffer and we wouldn't have a home or food. And so I couldn't, I couldn't get sick. So I always take my vitamins and I always go to bed by 9:30 and I'm up by 4:30, and I and I have my green smoothies and my supplement regime and my salads because and it's I'm not a Nazi about it. Occasionally I'll enjoy pizza or french fries or burgers or something, but it it's rare, it's the exception because I must prioritize prioritize my energy and my health in order to have the life that I want to have for myself and my children. So I'm gonna order a salad, a chicken salad. Love it.

SPEAKER_00 30:34

No, that's fantastic. I love a chicken salad so I'd be sitting right next to you. Well, I thank you so much for being part of this show. You are, I've said this so many times, a blessing, but I know there's moms out there, maybe even fathers, that want to learn more. How can they reach out to you and support you?

SPEAKER_02 30:51

My main website is ignitionpointacademy.com. As you mentioned, I do offer a lot of free trainings on the 12 core strategies to make sure your business is profitable, sustainable, and scalable, as well as a free ebook in that email campaign as well with 12 more customized strategies. If anyone wants a consultation, I have several coaches that are on my team that I would decide, you know, where you're at in your business, what kind of business, and then we would assign you to one of my coaches to give you a free 45-minute assessment with an entire roadmap. And that whether you work with us or not, there was one business owner who made $100,000 over the course of a year just from our free roadmap assessment that we sent, sent to them after that 45 minutes. So I do truly care. Business owners are my favorite, entrepreneurs are my favorite because you are the actual change makers, innovators. And we need you to succeed. So that is what I have built to this day as a platform for entrepreneurs across all ages and stages, teenagers to people in the nine-figure range. We have something for all of them on our platform. So thank you so much for having me.

SPEAKER_00 32:09

Oh no, you're a blessing. And thank you again. And audience, comment on the YouTube channel when she's on my podcast, comment. I'll get the message to her, reach out to her. I mean, uh, I've said enough, I won't say anymore. She's just incredibly special. And don't forget about my TV show as well. Every Friday at 2 p.m. Pacific, 5 p.m. Eastern. Together we serve. Kind of take the servant's heart to we need to do this as a community. Like she's doing so well. Debbie's just taking community to the next level. And as always, me and Debbie, thank you so much for watching or listening to this podcast. And we'll see you on the next episode of Doing Business with a Servant's Heart. Have all a great day.